Monday, May 13, 2013

Master of my own domain...but not really.

Most of you don’t know this, but along with giving up drinking for Lent, I also gave up masterbating. I wanted to test my willpower and discipline, as well as gain a sense of clarity. Miraculously I lasted the forty days, but the only thing I really experienced was frustration so when Lent was over I went back to going to town on myself. Hallelujah, my orgasms have resurrected!! Because I wasn’t doing it, I spent quite a bit of time thinking about it and how taboo the topic still really is. Well, in America anyway, because we all know every other country has no problem with sex, nudity, etc. It was only a couple of years ago I had my first frank discussion about the first time I masterbated, and it was one of the most refreshing conversations I’ve ever had. Not surprising, but my friends were all just as horny as I was when they were young. And, also like me, a few of them had their first "O" experience with a friend nearby. Ah yes, the bonds of sisterhood. I’ll never forget my introduction into the world of heavenly bliss. I’m not exactly sure how the idea even came about because I knew nothing about orgasms at the time, but somehow I found myself in the bedroom of a daughter of my parent’s friends. We sat on her bed for a while and talked, and within minutes I had a pillow in between my legs and was humping it until the cows came home. She sat there and stared at me for a while and ended up followed suit with her own pillow. A tingling feeling soon came over me and I sat up on her bed. “I’m done” I declared, but saw that she was still doing work. I decided to lay back down and try my hand at this gyrating act once again, and wouldn’t you know, the tingling sensation came over me not once, twice, but three more times. Clearly I was blessed at a very young age. We sat in silence for a while, not really looking at each other. A while later her mom called us down for dinner and we sheepishly made our way downstairs. We were beet red in the face and our hair was completely disheveled. “What were you two doing up there?” her mom asked. “Exercising” I mumbled. “Well, that must have been quite an exercise, look at how red you two are!” she exclaimed, and everyone at the table made it a point to notice. It was almost as bad as the time we got caught making our Barbies have sex. From then on, I humped my own pillow.

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